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The V-Steaming Revolution

V Steam labelsLook out, world, there's another wholesome cleansing process in town specifically for women: v-steaming. In this case, V is short for vagina; and as you might have guessed, vagina-steaming involves using an herbal  steaming process on one's hoo-ha for detoxification purposes. As a man, until recently I had never heard of this treatment, since we have no male equivalent. I guess we don't need one.

Of course, the body detoxes naturally via sweat and toilet activities. If you eat healthy, bathe regularly,  and exercise, that's all you really need.… but don't tell that to Hollywood.

V-steaming is serious business in the spa and alternative medicine communities. A number of different herbal blends are used, depending on one's needs. Also known as yoni steaming, it comes to us via Asia, Africa, and Central America, where it's been in use for years.  Proponents include model Chrissy Teigen (who recently posted a completely non-revealing Instagram photo of her trying it) and Gwyneth Paltrow, Tony Stark's love interest in the Iron Man and Avengers movies. As Ms. Teigen put it, she didn't know if it would work, but "can't hurt, right?" 

In the world of labels, we've never seen anything like the new DYI V-steaming products before. These herbal mixes do remind us a bit of potpourri mixtures. The herbs involved include basil, mugwort, rosemary, and wormwood in various admixtures, as well as other all-natural ingredients thought to promote the body's healing process. Among other things, v-steaming is said to cleanse, treat cramps, and clear up any discharge and, possibly, yeast infections.

Whether it works or not, we can't say. But whatever product you decide on, be sure not to sit too close to the steam, lest it scald you. A foot should be sufficient. Spas generally have special chairs to elevate the treatment area above the danger zone while still receiving the full therapeutic benefits. 

Until you need your v-steaming herbs, we suggest you preserve them and their potency in the safest  place possible: a freezer or refrigerator. The materials are already dried, and this will keep them from falling prey to any molds or fungi that might invade. That's why if you make v-steaming products, you should use our freezer labels, to ensure maximum freshness. You can't afford to expose the yonis you're trying to cleanse to detrimental organisms.

An Unexpected But Practical New Use for Labels

PeepholeIn South Korea, you can buy just about anything from vending machines, short of a live animal. And that's not exaggerating by much. One popular item is worn women's panties, though admittedly, that's not limited to Korea. It occurs in other Asian countries as well. 

What does all this have to do with labels? Well, we're not saying that men in Korea are any more perverted than men anywhere else, but there is this popular sport involving men drilling teeny, tiny peepholes in the walls of ladies' public bathroom stalls, and then installing teeny, tiny spy cameras in those holes. They use them for, er, live entertainment purposes that, in the American vernacular, involves the corporal punishment of small simians or asphyxiating poultry. (Sorry, we're not going to just right come out and sayit.) 

That's why the first thing most South Korean women do when entering public toilets these days  is search them for cameras, which may present as innocent-looking little spots on the wall or as suspicious holes. Smart ladies carry special kits that include pressure-sensitive stick-on labels they can use to cover suspected cameras, limiting their possibility of becoming the accidental stars of live sex shows.

Sadly, the spy cam schtick isn't limited to just toilets. Locker rooms, clothing store dressing rooms, swimming pool change rooms, and other such private places have been invaded by this "spy cam epidemic"—anywhere women, or occasionally men, undress for any reason. Often, salacious videos are posted on pornographic websites so the losers who collect them can share their illness.

The perpetrators who use public spaces for their sick pleasure usually take down the spy cams within a quarter-hour of installing them, having gotten what they want. Police in cities like Seoul know they're there, or have beenthere, but have yet to find a single camera in their sweeps. The perpetrators are too smart and too fast. 

Our intention here is not to make light of this perversion. By no means. This situation isn't amusing in the least, not in a country with the highest cellphone usage rate in the world, where it's easy to film and easy to post those videos. The men who do so rarely face punishment, while some of the women are so humiliated by the videos that they kill themselves. 

If you're a woman living or visiting South Korea, we recommend you carry a simple label kit with you everywhere you go, for those times when you need to use public facilities like the ones discussed here. Use the labels to cover up any blemishes you may find in the walls before doing your business, so as to prevent a pervert from getting his jollies. Although the deviants can easily come in later to remove the labels, this is a simple, inexpensive method that will work long enough to protect you from indecent violation by predators. 

An Unexpected Oxymoron

Peace MeatI'm a vegetarian -- and when I say "I," I'm talking about Bogdan D., the owner of Etiquette Systems. I don't eat meat for personal reasons, but it doesn't bother me that others choose to. In fact, we happen to make someone the best self-adhesive meat labels in the industry. 

What does bother me is to see vegans, who eschew all forms of violent against animals—especially their slaughter for food—perpetrate violence against humans instead. We've all seen stories of them splashing furs with red paint, but while it's clear vandalism, that's not true violence. But lately, some French vegans has taken it upon themselves to attack butcher shops.

I'm not talking about slaughterhouses, but boutique butchers where small numbers of animals are killed as humanely as possible and their meat sold to a select group of customers who take pride in traditional cuts of meat produced in traditional ways. These are Mom-and-Pop shops we're talking here, not chain stores. The owners often know everything about the origins of the meat they sale, often including how it was raised, what it was fed, and even when some of the animals were born and died. 

As vegans splash the neat little shops with paint, scrawl graffiti threats, and even break windows—a huge expense for a small business owner—the butchers are running scared. They know that all it takes is one person going overboard to step over the line from militant activism to terrorism. To most of them, it's already reached the dangerous harassment phase. 

These are exactly the kind of people we make meat labels for, or provide the raw materials to do so. We have to denounce the actions of these vegans as going too far, and ask them to stop. Yes, most people do know it's possible to survive on a vegetarian diet without health risks. But many people, especially those of the older generations, have not yet made the switch and are not be willing to. Meat is part of their diets. Humans are omnivores; Mother Nature made us able to eat almost anything, and meat is a handy protein source. It will not be easy for the entire population, or even a significant portion of it, to shift to vegetarianism—no matter how good it is for the planet. And it won't happen through violence.

Let's focus on the same types of debate, and rapport vegetarians, vegans, and non-vegetarians have had for years. If it happens that my company has to phase out meat labels because other forms of food became predominant, I would do so happily. But while no one has been hurt yet, violence and threats of violence will have an effect opposite of what vegans want—and it will take a great deal of work to regain what you've lost over the years. Please, stop the violence before it gets out of hand.

Why Meat Labels are So Important: a Case from India

freezer meat labelsIn the modern world, we depend on food labels to tell us a number of things about the products were consume, including their freshness and safety and exactly what's in them. Recently, a story hit the world news outlets that makes it clear why good meat labels are so important.

This past May, a scandal erupted in the Indian city of Kolkata, in Bengal Province, that sent meat sales plummeting in restaurants and grocery stores alike. The local police had raided several companies that sold meat to local restaurants and grocery stores, with horrifying results:: in one freezer, they found the rotting carcasses of numerous chickens, along with emaciated living chickens.

Worse, in another provider's freezers they found 20 metric tonnes of rotting animal carcasses—that's 20,000 kilograms, or about 44,000 pounds. News reports have been very careful not to mention the types of animal carcasses found, but rumors have abounded.

As it turns out, the perpetrators were literally retrieving the carcasses from the garbage. When they learned that someone had dropped animal remains off at a local landfill, they picked up the remains and returned the carcass(es) to their premises for processing. At one landfill, they had an employee—allegedly a former local politician—who tipped them off whenever an animal carcass was dumped.

Apparently, one reason they were able to get away with the scam for as long as they did was that they were mostly providing the meat to their customers unlabeled.

In some cases, however, they were wrapping it in the packaging of legitimate meat packagers. Whether the packaging was scavenged, stolen, or simply counterfeited remains uncertain.

How far the tainted meat has been shipped also remains uncertain, though some sources indicated that it was shipped throughout India and to nearby countries like Bangladesh.

Needless to say, locals were horrified. Most restaurants and grocery stores were quick to assure their customers that they procured their meat from other sources that had been deemed safe, with the TGI Friday's restaurant chain going so far as to admit they sourced their pork from the United States.

Nonetheless, many consumers weren't willing to take any chances, and sales of meat dishes in local restaurants immediately declined by as much as 60%. Some people still trusted chicken, but others opted for purely vegetarian meals. Later, as more news got out, chicken sales also plummeted all over the city.

Police arrested ten people in the wake of the raids. Another apparently fled to Bangladesh. It later came to light that more than half of 120 Bengali food samples tested in 2014-15 were found to be "adulterated," and that the local Food Safety and Standards Authority of India was aware that food quality in Bengal was poor in general.

It's easy to say that something like the Bengali scandal couldn't happen here, but it could. All it takes is a few unscrupulous individuals and governmental apathy. That's why accurate meat labels are so important—and it's one reason why certain language is required on the labels by the government.

Companies need to be careful about meat labels because they need to be careful about public health—and their own corporate integrity.

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